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type="text/css"></style> <div id="ct" class="ct2 wp cl"> <div class="mn"> <div class="bm_haa cl"> <div class="bm_h cl"> <a href="http://www.oecr.com/portal.php?mod=rss&catid=60" class="y xi2 rss" target="_blank" title="RSS">订阅</a><h1 class="xs2">文章</h1> </div></div> <div class="kjkjb"> <div class="bm vw" style="margin-bottom:0;"> <div class="h hm"> <div class="zxtoux"><img src="http://www.oecr.com/uc_server/avatar.php?uid=54876&size=small" /></div> <h1 class="ph">地大雾博，自强不吸！经典幽默“雾霾段子”集锦 </h1> <p class="xg1"> 时间：2017-1-5 15:38<a class="zz" href="home.php?mod=space&uid=54876">作者：update</a> 阅读<em id="_viewnum">(1356)</em> 评论: <a href="http://www.oecr.com/portal.php?mod=comment&id=5226&idtype=aid" title="查看全部评论"><em id="_commentnum">5</em></a></p> <div class="zxfb" ><a href="http://www.oecr.com/portal.php?mod=rss&catid=60" class="y xi2 rss" target="_blank" title="RSS">订阅</a></div> </div> <!--[diy=diysummarytop]--><div id="diysummarytop" class="area"></div><!--[/diy]--> <div class="s"> <div class="ss"><div><span>导读： </span>今天我们为大家收集了一些关于雾霾的经典段子，希望这些幽默的内容能够消除大家对雾霾的恐惧。</div> </div> <!--[diy=diysummarybottom]--><div id="diysummarybottom" class="area"></div><!--[/diy]--> <div class="d"> <!--[diy=diycontenttop]--><div id="diycontenttop" class="area"></div><!--[/diy]--> <table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="vwtb"><tr><td id="article_content"> 最近全国各地遭遇了严重的雾霾天气，雾霾对人的身体是有一定的危害的，为此很多人都比较担心自己的健康情况，今天我们为大家收集了一些关于雾霾的经典段子，希望这些幽默的内容能够消除大家对雾霾的恐惧。请看看下面的<b>地大雾博，自强不吸！经典幽默“雾霾段子”集锦</b>吧。<div><br></div><div><p style="text-align: center;"><a href="data/attachment/portal/201701/05/164747rwpw8cc2gnnw8cn3.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="data/attachment/portal/201701/05/164747rwpw8cc2gnnw8cn3.jpg"></a></p><div><p style="text-align: center;"><br></p><p> <b>自救</b></p><p><br></p><p> 雾霾办自救方案已出台： 1。个人疗法：吃萝卜吃木耳。2。全家疗法：用空气净化器。3。有钱又有闲的疗法：去外地。4。土豪疗法：移民。5。全民疗法：吸光它！请大家自行选择最佳方案!</p><p><br></p><p> <b>天津快板</b></p><p><br></p><p> 北京下大雾，咱一点都不怵，憋着口气去上班，嘛事都不误。</p><p><br></p><p> 介雾真不小，没嘛能见度，拐弯公共大厕所，以为是别墅。</p><p><br></p><p> 开车别太快啊，眼神要hold住，要不一脚踩下去，可就上了树。</p><p><br></p><p> 有的戴口罩，有的打出租，还有几个大傻子，上街练跑步。</p><p><br></p><p> 有人说雾好，有人说雾酷，有人说介雾给北京，穿了大棉裤。</p><p><br></p><p> 介雾可真哏儿啊。 赶紧您的，喂人民服雾!</p><p><br></p><p><b> 情侣</b></p><p><br></p><p> 有对情侣，他们吵架了，他们约定一个向左走，一个向右走，一百步后回头如果能够看到对方的话，他们就和好，他们各走了一步便没有忍住都回头了，结果他们还是分手了，因为雾霾太严重了。</p><p><br></p><p> <b>我是北京人</b></p><p><br></p><p> “第一次来伦敦，第一次遇见大雾，她走丢了，眼镜都掉了。这时，听到耳边柔和的普通话响起：‘迷路了吧?你想去哪儿?我带你吧。’那人带着她七拐八绕，很快就 到达了目的地。临别，看着他在雾气里模糊的面庞，她好奇地问道：‘您是盲人?’他笑着回答说：‘不，我是北京人。’”</p><p><br></p><p style="text-align: center;"><a href="data/attachment/portal/201701/05/153323knlx32yrrpfl6bh3.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="data/attachment/portal/201701/05/153323knlx32yrrpfl6bh3.jpg"></a></p><p><br></p><p> <b>我的车呢?</b></p><p><br></p><p> “北京今天烟雾缭绕!能见度五米!早上一同事开车迷路了，下车寻找路标。看到路边一个哥们儿也在寻找就上前去问：‘哥们儿，这是哪?’这哥们儿很详细地为他 指明道路!道声谢刚想走，转身问那个哥们儿：‘你都知道道你还在找什么呢?’那哥们回答：‘我也是看路标来着!路标找着了!可是我找不到我的车了!’”</p><p><br></p><p> <b>孙悟空的由来</b></p><p><br></p><p> “菩提祖师见猴王长得像个猢狲，便给他取了个姓氏为‘孙’，至于名字，祖师抬头望了望天色，皱着眉头说道：‘干脆你就叫雾空吧。’悟空名字就这么叫开了。”</p><p><br></p><p> <b>雾以吸为贵</b></p><p><br></p><p> 经过北京2000万人几天几夜的呼吸，北京的空气质量终于有所改善。新的北京精神由此诞生：“厚德载雾，自强不吸，霾头苦干，再创灰黄！”事实再次证明：雾以吸为贵啊！…</p><p><br></p><p> <b>哈尔滨烟雾</b></p><p><br></p><p> 哈尔滨今天烟雾缭绕!能见度五米!早上一同事开车迷路了，下车寻找路标。看到路边一个哥们儿也在寻找就上前去问：“哥们儿，这是哪?”这哥们儿很详细地为他指明道路!道声谢刚想走，转身问那个哥们儿：“你都知道道你还在找什么呢?”那哥们回答：“我也是看路标来着!路标找着了!可是我找不到我的车了!”</p><p><br></p><p> <b>对联</b></p><p><br></p><p> 上联:</p><p><br></p><p> 厚德载雾，自强不吸</p><p><br></p><p> 下联:</p><p><br></p><p> 霾头苦干，再创灰黄</p><p><br></p><p> 以上就是跟大家带来的<b>地大雾博，自强不吸！经典幽默“雾霾段子”集锦</b>。如果您还有什么幽默的内容想跟大家分享，请到光电<a href="http://bbs.oecr.com" target="_blank" class="relatedlink">论坛</a>的非技术版块去发帖吧。</p><p><br></p><p style="text-align: center;"><a href="data/attachment/portal/201701/05/153639v7fa7i97c42y94f0.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="data/attachment/portal/201701/05/153639v7fa7i97c42y94f0.jpg"></a></p><p style="text-align: center;"><br></p><p style="text-align: center;"><span style="line-height: 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name="comment_anchor_10320"></a> <dl id="comment_10320_li" class="ptm pbm bbda cl"> <dt class="mbm"> <span class="y xw0 xi2"> <a href="javascript:;" onclick="portal_comment_requote(10320, '5226');">引用</a> </span> <a href="http://club.oecr.com/space-uid-71994.html" class="xi2 xw1" c="1">小曾</a> <span class="xg1 xw0">2017-1-5 20:12</span> </dt> <dd>努力赚取光电贝，早日当上VIP。</dd> </dl><a name="comment_anchor_10318"></a> <dl id="comment_10318_li" class="ptm pbm bbda cl"> <dt class="mbm"> <span class="y xw0 xi2"> <a href="javascript:;" onclick="portal_comment_requote(10318, '5226');">引用</a> </span> <a href="http://club.oecr.com/space-uid-24044.html" class="xi2 xw1" c="1">liuyingzhuo</a> <span class="xg1 xw0">2017-1-5 19:12</span> </dt> <dd>前排支持下！</dd> </dl><a name="comment_anchor_10316"></a> <dl id="comment_10316_li" class="ptm pbm bbda cl"> <dt class="mbm"> <span class="y xw0 xi2"> <a href="javascript:;" onclick="portal_comment_requote(10316, '5226');">引用</a> </span> <a href="http://club.oecr.com/space-uid-20362.html" class="xi2 xw1" c="1">风生水起</a> <span class="xg1 xw0">2017-1-5 18:12</span> </dt> <dd>妥妥的支持！</dd> </dl><a name="comment_anchor_10314"></a> <dl id="comment_10314_li" class="ptm pbm bbda cl"> <dt class="mbm"> <span class="y xw0 xi2"> <a href="javascript:;" onclick="portal_comment_requote(10314, '5226');">引用</a> </span> <a href="http://club.oecr.com/space-uid-15431.html" class="xi2 xw1" c="1">rolexie</a> <span class="xg1 xw0">2017-1-5 17:11</span> </dt> <dd>这也没什么吧。</dd> </dl><a name="comment_anchor_10313"></a> <dl id="comment_10313_li" class="ptm pbm bbda cl"> <dt class="mbm"> <span class="y xw0 xi2"> <a href="javascript:;" onclick="portal_comment_requote(10313, '5226');">引用</a> </span> <a href="http://club.oecr.com/space-uid-99784.html" class="xi2 xw1" c="1">qingyuan9677</a> <span class="xg1 xw0">2017-1-5 16:41</span> </dt> <dd>…… 啥都不说了 很好</dd> </dl></div> </div> <!--[diy=diycontentcomment]--><div id="diycontentcomment" 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